Thursday, February 2, 2012

Maybe 'It' Can Stay - Part I

The first thing I had to do was let 'it' know who was boss.  I really showed him, too.  I chased him all over the yard, rolled him around, grabbed him by the neck (only when Mom wasn't looking) and read him the fine writing, "This is MY pack and you happen to be interfering in the way I do things, Shorty!"  He didn't seem to listen much because he never sat still or stopped jumping and biting me, Mom, Dad--everyone except Bob Barker who's a troll.  He also pees and poops everywhere all the time.  What an uncivilized furhead.  Mom said she's buying stock in 409, paper towels and Swiffer Wetjets.  



Mom came home with all these toys, but his little peabrain isn't too big yet so he chases lids...
  
What a goober.  It's sure going to be easy to pull one over on this one...and I thought Bob Barker was goofy.
 
Sometimes, he can act like a real Shiloh and pose all nice and calm but what's with those ears?  Sometimes, one goes up, then the other...must be some short-dog disease because I'm sure I Never had my ears anyplace but up where they belong. 

 And sometimes, they just go to one side like a north wind's about to blow him over.




He's a lazy puppy, too--lays around to eat his food.  What's so hard about standing up to chow down? I never did that either.
 The Real Short Dogs, Bob Barker and Agnies of Pissisi, aren't very keen on him.  Mother Agnies seems confused (more than usual) because every time she 'thinks' (and that's not very often) I'm getting a little too rough with the Little V, she charges at Me growling all scary-like...woooo...I'm so terrifed.  Then, if Little V runs, bites and jumps on her, she gets all bitchy and snaps and growls at Him!  Go figure.  Girls.  Bob Barker just wants V's toys, food And his crate...not anything I would ever tolerate because he smells like a Basset and if you've never had the luxury of being with a Pack-O-Basset, take note--Body Spray, Air Spray and Xtreme Candles are a necessity.  Must be those huge, dangly ears.

Something strange is going on with Little V, however.  It appears he is growing VERY fast...take a look at these feet--they're almost as big as mine...maybe it's a sign...maybe I should think about the future...I'm thinkin' he's gonna be a beast!  Nah, not possible.  He's just an annoying gnat.  Probably won't get much taller.




Anyways, He has a long ways to go to catch up.  I'm not worried...really--even if he's gaining 10 lbs every couple of weeks, so what?  I'm the biggest Shiloh in this house and I'm not afraid of some weany boy.
Mom said I shouldn't put this pic in the blog because it DOES look like she's choking the little mutt but she's really just trying to keep her fingers on her hands...she says he's a Piranha (and a pee-head and full of poop) but I think he's gonna get to stay because he finally figured out where the door is and I think he got tired of hearing her being cranky about it.  Could it be that boys just like to pee more than we Diva Dogs? 
By the way, I taught him how to open the door, too...he's a quick learner cause I only had to show him a couple of times and before I knew it, in the house he went along with the rest of us!  Now before you go thinking he's brilliant or anything so silly, he can still be as dumb as a stick in my opinion--take a look at this picture and you'll see what I mean.  Really--this is as close to 'your head up your (my) butt' as it comes!  Of course, I put up with it because he doesn't know any better and as long as he doesn't bite my tail, it's OK.

We do play a lot and it's pretty cool to have another Shiloh around.  The Short Dogs really get on my nerves because they're only good for about a minute of hardcore playtime.  Little V can go forever and I usually have to settle him down after a while.  It's my job.  I have so much to teach him...stair climbing, Short Dog Irritation 101, cat chasing, house-shoe stealing...you get the picture.  
Seriously, Mom says it's uncanny how much we're alike when we both stand side-by-side or do the same things.  Of course, he'll never be as beautiful as I am.....
but I think I'll let him stay.